13: Let me see your face

The next day which was Monday, I nearly called in so k to stay home. I thought about all the possibilities, how I would get stared at, and how I wasn't emotionally stable but I went.

I clocked in late and goodness, I had no idea why I met with Nnena in the elevator. She looked absolutely stunning, and elegant, and had her shoulders high. I wasn't gonna lie, I don't know how to feel after what Derrick said about her.

'get yourself back together, Amanda, Aldo isn't your man'

Yet.

He hasn't asked me out, we just had s*x once and he made me c*m. I just had no idea why I felt so possessive about him.

"So...." I heard Nnena start.

I glanced at her and it was like she was saying something before. I didn't want her to feel uncomfortable so I grinned so vastly that my chin hurt. I felt the place that was healing get stretched and my wounded right eye hurt.

"Did anything happen to your..."

"No I am fine" I cut her short and moved a little away from her.

She didn't look happy and I liked it.

"This Thursday is my birthday and I am throwing a party" She smiled and waited for a few seconds.

I knew she waiting for me to say something but I didn't. I just stood still, wondering how she must have felt when she had s*x with Aldo and even worked for him.

"Please come to my party" she finally giggled.

Damn!

Her smile seemed so flawless and if I was into girls, I would have asked her out. I would have made her be my woman and tried to overlook Aldo but nah! I had to deal with the fact.

"That would be great" I smiled back even when my inner self was screeching at me to turn down the offer "Is it like a theme party or I can wear whatever I have"

With the look on her face, I could tell that she was thinking about it. I hoped she just said she was joking and I wasn't invited but the elevator notified us of her stop and she straightened up.

"It's a black theme party. Whatever you like but black" She said.

I watched her walk out and heaved a sigh of solace when she walked out. How come I felt so inferior and obliged to show her that I could be enough.

In silence, I waited, got to my floor, and headed to my office. I ignored everyone and even when they didn't call me, I just felt they had their eyes all over me. I knew they should because of my heavy makeup, dress, and hair.

I wearing an orange dress Aldo got for me. The heels I was was something I had before but it matched. My hair made me feel more pretty and I hoped I would make Aldo speechless when I saw him.

s**t!

I didn't want to see him.

What if he asked about my face, I wasn't the type that like makeup and I knew what I did wasn't so good. It was two hours of watching it from social media and trying so many foundations.

Relaxing, wondering why I even had to work here when I literally do nothing daily, I got a call.

Without looking at it, I expected that it would be from Aldo but it was a different number.

"Who can it be?"

I thought about it being my dad or his wife, but nothing just seemed to come to my mind so I took it.

"Hello?"

"You fvcking blocked my call and threw my gift in the trash!"

He wasn't happy.

I flinched, shaking as if he was in the room abs looked at the screen again. He better not get a new line just to yell at me.

"You know no one would love you like I do, Amanda! No one would want to manage you"

Was I that bad?

My lips quivered and uncontrollable tears began to flow down my eyes. My heart ached and it was like I got stabbed over ten times.

"Please leave me alone, Derrick. I don't know what you want for me" I whispered.

My voice even betrayed me as it sounded faint and weak. I clenched my free palm and gnashed my teeth so I wouldn't cry anymore.

"You are a b***h and you know that!"

I took the phone off my ear and slowly ended the call.

No one deserves this. I knew I didn't deserve it.

My Dad, no mom, no one to even love me. Why was I even born?

I rushed to my water dispenser and drank two cups. I was shaking and I spilled water everywhere when. I tried to take the third cup.

"Dear lord" I panicked as the phone began to ring again.

I knew it was Derrick so I let it ring. I dropped the full cup and walked back to my desk just to have the call end immediately. The phone vibrated to alert me of a text message and I immediately opened it.

Although, I forced myself not to open it. I knew Derrick would never say anything nice but I needed to see it. Maybe he would be different. Maybe he would apologize and learn that I really do not want him again. Maybe he would admit that I loved him, I believed in him, I did all he wanted, all he asked me and I had all my faith in him till he ghosted me in Germany and didn't say anything about it.

I took deep breaths and mentally prepared myself for the worst. Yep! I saw the worst.

**' You B!tch! I hate it when you act like you are special!

You should know your place and know that you are not even up to my taste but I fvcking want to help you.

I want you and I own you, Amanda. If not for me, you won't even be able to live through college. '**

Before I could respond, Derrick called back. This time I was mad! I had lots of things to tell him that I wouldn't tell him in person.

"You are an asshole, Derrick. You are an undersized d**k that had lost of sense of reasoning"

I was breathing heavily, shaking, and tapping myself on the back for being brave. Although I heard him say stuff I wasn't listening. He could call me b***h all day if he want, I just need to take him where he belongs.

"I stayed with you in college, regard you, still love your cheating ass, and never talk back because you would hit me. You are a shameless bully and I would recommend you face someone your size"

I could feel his rage. The way he yelled at the phone and gave this hushed whisper as if he was with someone.

"You know I will kill you when I get to you"

"If you come here to me, I will call the police" I blurted out.

I wasn't sure if I would even be able to do it. I just needed him to know that if I really had one to stand by me, the law might. Aldo would not want his workers messing around with the law so he should help.

"I swear, I'll frame you with rape, assault, and you...you.." I waited for a few seconds as I thought of what to say "You have a small d**k and you can't even be a man in bed!"

I knew it hurt.

Although my eyes were wet, try tears on my face and my cracked hurting lips, I still smirked.

"You know back in college, I had to pretend so you would not know how bad you were"

With that, I ended the call.

I was pleased with myself and at the same time, I was worried about how much I must have hurt him. Before he could call back; as I thought, I blocked the number and stared at it.

He was a jerk, he would always be a jerk and he deserved to feel bad.

The emotional support I needed had returned. I had no idea how it happened but I felt better. I cared not about my messed up makeup or slight headache, I just searched for movies and began to watch.

I laughed, cried, got angry, and excited about it all till it ended. After the movie, I checked the time and saw I had about two hours before my closing time and I also didn't have my Makeup.

Thinking about what could possibly go wrong, I settled my mind to go home after cleaning as much mistake of makeup as I could. I looked better, the bruises were more visible so I placed my hair over the right side of my face.

Using the screen of my face as a mirror, I felt satisfied with the outcome. I hope people will look at my hair.

The knock at the door distracted me and even though I didn't have enough time to cover my face, I still told the person to come in. Nnena walked in with a paper bag of chicken nuggets, fries, and soda. She got to me, sat without being asked to, and looked dead into my eyes.

"Two years ago, my ex would hit me, control me, and make me remember that I am black and dirty," Nnena said.

I knew where she was heading too, I knew she saw me and concluded I had been assaulted and she didn't seem to like it.

"You have us. You don't need to stay silent about it because..." She paused and looked away from me.

Her eyes were stormy and I could see how desperately she was trying not to cry. Did I trigger something? Was hers too bad?

I moved closer and hugged her so that she had her face on my chest and her arms wrapped around my waist. She was shaking.

"I have a best friend who didn't look it well and she is dead because she didn't speak up" she cried "I saw what Derrick did last Friday at the water..."

I moved away from her. I couldn't believe it and at the same time, I knew it wasn't hidden.

"I wanted to get something from the same floor and I saw it. If he is the one that hit you, we should do something"

I smiled and hugged her. There was this feeling that engulfed me. It was like love, hope, and support. The family I never had, the friends I never had, I see them in Nnena.

Yet, I remembered that she had s*x with Aldo.

"Thanks, Nne," I said and left her in my seat.

She left the food, smiled at me, and closed my door as gently as she could.

I like her. I don't know why but I like her again and if she had something with Aldo, that was in the past.

"Damn I am so hungry," I said as I began to eat.

I began to eat, smiling and sniffing at how loved I felt before my phone rang. As usual, I thought it would be Derrick, and I was ready for him until I remembered that I already blocked his second line.

Grabbing the phone, I felt like I was melting from the inside when I saw his contact. Mr Aldo Moguel.

I took the call, and with chicken nugget in my mouth, I muffled.

"Hello Sir," I swallowed "Sorry, I had food in my mouth. I shouldn't be eating in the office and ..."

"I know, " Aldo interrupted me "Just know not to eat in the office again. You know that's what we have a cafeteria"

I felt creeped out and strange. The hairs at the back of my neck stood as I recalled the way he said 'I know' over and over again.

"I won't be around for some days," He said.

That was odd. My boss should not be telling me that unless he needed me to do something for him.

"You still have cash. Don't walk late at night and ..." He switched it to camera.

Immediately I looked at the screen, I shirked. On no account would I let him see my face so as much as I could, I made sure to abide by that.

"Hey," he smiled.

I felt happy to see his face. He looked stressed but happy just as I was. It looked like he was in a moving car and alone in the back seat.

"I can't see your face, move the camera"

I chuckled.

I was shy, I didn't want him to see me like that and I had no idea if I would be able to explain if he saw my face so I didn't.

"Move your camera, Angioletto"

I melted and my inside burned. I knew I would look like a freaked tomato because I was blushing too hard.

"You don't want me to see your work face?"

That was it! I nodded and placed my finger over the camera.

"Work face isn't so good, Sir...and- Net- Sir?"

I made the camera flash at my face for a second before ending the call. I placed it on flight mode and hoped he would not realize that I just pretended to have a bad network when the wifi of this company was faster than my heartbeat for him.