Unexpected (MxM)

Chapter One- Frankie I look down at my book using my finger to follow along as I read, tuning out Moth’s guitar and singing in the background. I turn the page and keep reading, but falter when I hear him switch songs. He strums the guitar a few times before singing soft words. “Long blonde hair, baby eyes. Can’t get him off my mind.” I turn my head and watch him. His eyes are closed as he strums his guitar, clearing his throat before singing again with a deep mellow tone. “His beauty is unrealized, and I need him here in my life.” “Did you write that?” I ask, smiling at him when he opens his eyes. He smirks and sets his guitar aside to get on his bed with me. I’m lying on my stomach, so he decides to lie next to me. He reaches his hand out to brush my hair over my shoulder, kissing my cheek. “I thought you said you have laser focus and can tune me out.” “I can.” I roll my eyes and blush looking back down at my book and starting to read again. “So you were listening because you like it?” “I like all of your music.” “Really? I thought you liked Taylor Swift.” He leans closer, kissing my neck this time. I let out a soft breath, losing my place in the book when I feel his tongue against my skin, sucking gently on the spot where he kissed me. “I-I do.” After a second, I shove his head away. “You can’t leave marks on me. Will and Sawyer will probably get together to kill you.” “Totally worth it.” He lays on his back, still looking over at me. “I wrote it about you. I only had a verse before I scrapped it. Eclipse won’t go for a solo with acoustic guitar.” “Why does everything have to get approved by everyone in the band? I think it sounded great.” He sighs and shrugs. “That’s just part of being in a band. Everyone wants to be able to play the songs and everyone wants to love what they’re doing. That’s why we always try to throw in a little drum solo and a sick baseline for Cas and Jonis. Don’t even get me started on Gwen. She’s always making me write a harmony so she can sing backup.” I tilt my head, looking over at him after putting my bookmark where it goes and shutting it. I know being in a band is difficult, but I didn’t realize he couldn’t write songs without them. “Aren’t you guys doing auditions too?” “Yeah. We didn’t want a ton of people to know my address so people are sending in video auditions. We’re going to listen to them once everyone else gets here.” We’re always at his house. He just lives with his mom and the whole basement is his, so we’ve got all the privacy we need, but I still feel bad that he can never come to my place without people breathing down our necks or being mean to him. “Sorry.” “Why are you always apologizing? What are you sorry for?” “That my family makes it so hard for us to hang out,” I explain further, rolling over to lay on my back as well before scooting closer to put my head on his chest. “I don’t care. I know the impression I give with what I wear and how I look. No parent wants their sweet kid to date some f****d up loser like me.” He jokes, looking down at me while running his fingers through my long hair. “I just wish they could see that I’d never try to change you. I like you just the way you are. Swiftie and all.” I smile, not bothering to respond as I look at him. He’s got piercings everywhere. One in his eyebrow, two in his nose, three on his lips. He recently got a tongue piercing too and that’s not even including the ones on his ears. He does stick and poke tattoos on himself as well. He’s got a bunch of stupid ones all over his body. My favorite one is a cat playing guitar on his leg. His favorite one is a smiling pickle on his butt cheek. Moth sighs and rolls his eyes when the smell of weed drifts down the steps and into the room. Sometimes he ignores it and we just don’t bother talking about his mom’s habit of smoking around us. Sometimes she’ll offer some and we’ll either deny or accept. Other times, like this, he feels bad about it. “Sorry.” “Now who’s apologizing?” He shakes his head and huffs softly. “She shouldn’t be doing it this much. I know you don’t like how it smells either.” “It’s fine. I’ll just get extra close so that I can only smell you.” I move closer to him, burying my face in his neck with a deep breath. He smells so good. He uses this environmentally friendly unscented soap, so all I ever smell is his natural musk. It’s surprising that he doesn’t smell terrible all the time considering he only showers three times a week. I asked him about it and he gave me a long story about how just because society tells people what to do doesn’t mean that it’s correct. He thinks it’s a total waste of water to shower if he isn’t dirty. He also wears the same clothes for two or three days before washing them. He’s kind of cute when he talks about that stuff. I’d never met a punk rock environmentalist before. He’s also got some pretty interesting political opinions. “I could ask her to stop. She wouldn’t make you uncomfortable on purpose.” “It’s okay. I promise.” I go quiet for a minute, lying silently on his chest before speaking again. “How do you not get upset with her? Not because of me, but she doesn’t take care of you how she should, right? She used to offer food to us all the time, and she doesn’t anymore. Sometimes I’ll come over and stay for hours and leave without her even noticing. Do you ever get mad that she doesn’t pay attention to you?” “No. I’m capable of taking care of myself. I think it’s a mother’s instinct to care for their kid. My mom does care about me a lot and she loves me. She knows that I’m almost an adult and I think she just trusts that I can take care of myself. She calls and texts me when I’m gone too long, so it’s not like I’m invisible or anything.” He kisses my forehead gently before pulling back. “Why?” I look down, fidgeting slightly before pulling my phone out. “My mom texted me.” “She contacted you? I thought when Sawyer officially adopted you she agreed not to speak to any of you again.” “She did,” I admit. “I haven’t told anyone else.” “Did you respond?” “Not yet.” “Do you want to?” I sigh and open the message, sitting up in the bed to look down at my phone. It just says ‘Are you doing okay? I miss you.’, but looking at it makes me want to cry. “I don’t know. I want to hate her. She left me. She ditched our whole family. I’m glad Julian and the other little kids were too young by the time she left to remember what it was like before, but I do. I remember what it was like to do fun things with her. I wasn’t in school yet, so it was me and her all the time. She used to pull me out of daycare to take me places and I remember how she used to call me her most special baby. It makes me so mad because I always see other people talking about how they’d die before leaving their kids, and she acted like it wasn’t a big deal. How special could I have been if she still left?” He sits up too, but gives me space, not touching me or getting too close as he answers. “It’s not your fault she left. Maybe she thought it was the right thing to do. Maybe she thought Sawyer would do better.” “He was a kid.” I take a deep breath, staring at the message for a minute longer before putting my phone away without responding. “I hate that I can’t hate her for it. I mean, she’s my mom. I hate that I can’t stop thinking about it. She’s been practically out of our lives for almost ten years and I still just… I don’t know.” “You’re right. She’s your mom. If you want to respond and talk with her, I think you should. Don’t worry about what your siblings would think. Just because they might hate her doesn’t mean you have to.” He leans closer now and pecks my lips before laying back on the bed. “Do you want to lay down a little longer before everyone gets here?” I look at him shyly and move so that I’m sitting in his lap. “I had something else in mind if you’re okay with it.” He looks up at me with a little smirk and gestures for me to continue. “I don’t think I could ever say ‘no’ to you, Barbie.” I roll my eyes at the nickname before leaning down to kiss his neck. It’s not like I’m trying to be a slut or anything. My siblings constantly call me out and make fun of me for losing my virginity so young. I don’t understand the issue. I know that Sawyer wanted me to wait until I was at least 16, but Noel and Candace were both having s*x at this age. Honestly, I think they’re just upset because they expected me to be a virgin until I was in my twenties or something. Nobody looks at the president of the book club and thinks ‘Wow he must get ass’. I surprised myself too. Maybe it was my naivety that made me so willing to do anything Mason wanted, but it isn’t like that with Moth. He’s so respectful and attentive. He never makes me do anything I don’t want to, and even when I try to do stuff with him, he can tell when I’m not really into it. Sometimes I try to get him off because I feel like that’s what he wants, and he never lets me. He always puts me and what I want above what he wants. Sex isn’t so scary and dreadful with him. It’s like I want to jump his bones all the time. I just hate that anytime we do something, everyone blames him like he’s coercing me or making me do s****l things with him. Honestly, it’s almost always me who initiates it. He sits up to pull his shirt off as I unbutton his jeans. I kiss him again before moving my lips down his neck and chest. He doesn’t have abs or anything, but I love his body just as much as he loves mine. I slide down his body and lick just above his waistband, moving to pull his pants down. Before I get the chance, the door opens. I instinctively pull away and almost rush to explain myself, but stop when I see it’s just Jonis. “Oh, s**t. My bad. I just wanted to grab some sodas for the guys.” He tells us, walking in to open the mini fridge Moth recently got. His brother has been spoiling him since they reconnected. Moth isn’t super into the idea of being close with his brother, but it’s obvious how much Fizzle is trying to get on his good side. Jonis grabs an armful of different sodas before walking towards the door, pausing to turn to us. “You can go ahead and continue until Gwen gets here. I’ll tell them not to come in.” “Thanks, dude, but you kinda killed the mood,” Moth explains with me nodding along. Moth starts to put his clothes on as Jonis walks out. “Sorry, Barbie. We’ll have to rain check.” “Whatever you say, Ken.” I agree, walking into the main area to sit on the couch as Jonis and Caspian go over some parts of the new song Gwen wrote. Moth decides to join them, leaving Corduroy and me to talk like we usually do. Everyone just calls him Cory because they think his name is long. It is, but I think it’s unique. Cory is Caspian’s best friend, but he’s not musically inclined either, so we’re usually just around to cheer them on. “Are you almost done with the book?” Cory asks, making me shake my head. “I’ve read it before, but it’s so hard to get through this time. Moth is always distracting me.” “Yeah, I get that. I have to follow Cas around during school to make sure he doesn’t fight anymore at school. His dads would kill him if he got suspended again.” He admits. Caspian isn’t very good at ignoring people. He doesn’t care when they tease him, but he’s fiercely protective of and loyal to his friends. Especially Cory whom he took under his wing as soon as he transferred to the middle school he went to. “What did they say to you this time?” “Nothing too bad. The usual.” “Why do they call you pauper anyway? Isn’t your cousin super rich? I thought you had a huge house.” I ask, tilting my head curiously. He looks down at his lap and fiddles with the hem of his book club tee shirt. “They don’t mean pauper like poor. They’re probably too dumb to know that word. They mean pill popper. They stuffed my locker with pill capsules filled with salt.” “Since when do you take pills?” “Since seventh grade.” Corduroy and I don’t talk all the time. We used to sit quietly during the Eclipse rehearsals, so I don’t know a whole lot about him. I thought I’d know if he was on medications though. Is that important for friends to talk about? Are we friends? He sits in silence for a minute before nudging me. “Are you going to ask?” “What?” “What do I take pills for?” “I’m not trying to interrogate you.” “I haven’t found a good time to bring it up because it freaks most people out, but everyone else in the band already knows.” “We aren’t in the band.” I give him a little half smile and reach my hand out to touch his pink hair. “And you won’t freak me out, Corduroy. I have ten siblings. I think I’ve seen just about everything I can see.” “We’re their groupies,” he argues before continuing. “And I’m schizophrenic. I didn’t have to take pills before because I lived with my parents and I was homeschooled. I never had any negative symptoms until I moved in with my cousin and started public school when my parents died. I do now though so I have to take meds to make them go away.” “The medicine makes it all go away?” I ask, trying to keep myself from saying something stupid like ‘You don’t act schizophrenic’. The only person I know who takes medicine for mental illnesses is Julian, and he hates when people say ‘You don’t seem autistic’. His medicine isn’t a cure though. He still struggles even though he takes his meds every day. “No. That’s why I joined the book club. Listening to music and reading and distracting myself in other ways helps the negative hallucinations stay away. It’s been pretty helpful. I was even able to lower the dosage I usually take.” “That’s awesome. If you ever want to talk about it, I’m totally happy to listen.” “Sorry I’m late. Ava wouldn’t go down for her nap.” Gwen sighs. Ava is her daughter. We don’t like talking about how she ended up with a kid. Nobody knows who Ava’s biological dad is, and considering Gwen never had her DNA tested, I’m assuming she doesn’t want to know. As far as everyone important is concerned, Jonis is Ava’s dad. “You’re early actually. Three minutes to spare.” Corduroy points out. “You guys are at my house tomorrow night, right? My mom is dying to see her.” “Yeah, I packed our things already.” She tells him, pecking his lips quickly. Gwen always talks about how great it was to have Jonis through that whole situation. They were dating already, but she told me she assumed he’d leave her because of it. Especially when she decided not to get an abortion, but he didn’t. After being there as much as he could when she was pregnant, they decided they wanted his name on the birth certificate. “Alright, boys. Everyone should be ready.” Gwen shouts clapping her hands to get everyone’s attention. She might sing backup, but everyone knows she’s the leader of the band. She hands everyone a packet of sheet music and starts to plug all the instruments in. “Here’s the songs we’re working on today, and I don’t want to hear s**t about them. These are the ones that make sure everyone gets to show off a little bit, so no complaints. Let’s start.”